September 17, 2010

Managing Expectations

"God, give me the strength to accept that which I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference," quoted the keynote speaker at our orientation last month. This is, of course, the Serenity Prayer, AKA the AA Prayer, but he thought--and I can't help but totally, 100%, completely, entirely agree--that it applies pretty well to the teaching abroad situation.

There are a lot of expectations to deal with here: the expectations you have of your job; of your house; of Japan; the expectations your job has of you. Even little things, like, "I didn't expect to run into face-hugger-sized spiders, but there's one in that tree there!"*

Lately, I've been feeling a wall between my expectations, my job's expectations, and reality: I want to do X and they want me to do Y. I thought I would be Z-ing, but instead I A and B. Or I ask to C, and they look at me like I'm crazy. The latest discussion is over vacation time, a fair chunk of which is coming up soon--but for various reasons, none of it on the days it should be. So they want me to take my holiday on this day, I want to take it on this day, etc.**

It's all working out in the end, happily. They want me to come to such-and-such, and I find a way to do that. I want to go away on so-and-so, and I find a way to do that, too. It's all pretty okay, actually. A little frustrating as a process, but I think the solution will turn out to be fine.

So why do I mention this? What's the point?

Well:

This week, some fellow ALTs and I taught a special class at another school on World Peace. One of our questions for the students was: "What makes you feel peace the most in your daily life?" And without fail, in every group, at least two people out of eight said it was talking with their friends.

"You're right," I told them. "When I'm feeling bad, I call my best friend, and that makes me feel peaceful again." Which is both unoriginal and the sign of a really awesome friend, which I am lucky to have***. Hi, Nagano!

So my point, Future JET, is this: for Pete's sake, make sure you have a decent support system here. You never know when you're going to need it, even over the smallest things. You need someone you can just say, "Face-hugging spider! Face-hugging spider!*" to every so often.

Oh, and make friends with your OL. She'll give you pudding. For real.

---

*Incidentally, this is the reason behind that failed photo essay I never posted: the zoom on my camera is terrible, and I couldn't bring myself to get close enough to the spiders to get decent pictures of them.

**Amazingly, this negotiation, or whatever, has included me asking if I can work on a day they were planning for me not to. If you told me I'd ever be asking to work...)

**Even if, sort of ironically, the entire vacation negotiation is happening because of said friend. So I get frustrated because it's hard to visit her, and then I get relief by talking to her about being frustrated that I'm having trouble visiting her. God bless the Internet, anyway.

September 12, 2010

PS: 9/11

Addendum: Of course, today was the anniversary of 9/11, if you'd somehow managed to not be bombarded with that. But I spend enough time trying to avoid talking about that in my daily life, so I think, perhaps, not today either.

Except to say: A continued RIP to everyone who lost their lives, and Shana Tovah to everyone who survived. Be well for another year.

The city that definitely sleeps

One thing I realized on my way home tonight, having just left a perfectly nice party in mid-par, is that I've actually never lived in a place where I had to leave at the end of the night or risk not being able to go home at all.

Hell, I've never really lived in a place where "end of the night" was a mandatory thing.

I mean, I spent all of college either living in a Greek house, or being good enough friends with the members to sleep over. Plus, well, living on a campus less than a mile from end to end. And New York-- was New York. There have been plenty of times I've stayed over at a friend's or taken a taxi, but not because I had no other choice. The subways ran. I just wasn't always on them.

So really, this whole "well if I don't go home at 11 PM I don't go home at all" thing is totally new to me, and really confusing to deal with.

Sure, I bet it could be a convenient exit strategy. "It's not that I'm not enjoying marathon strip Risk, I just really need to be on that train." But all too often, I've wound up leaving things I was perfectly well enjoying, so I can see I'm going to need to make a contingency plan.


Relatedly, have a picture of the hotbed of urban activity that is Beppu at night.



99% of those lights still on are pachinko parlors.

So I guess there's nothing else for me to do but go to bed now, or have another beer and rewatch last week's (amazing) Mad Men. Either way, goodnight, Internet!

September 01, 2010

Anecdotes:

Bits and pieces from this week:

***

One of my schools has a festival coming up. I've been asked to sing a solo.

In "We Are The World."

My Life Is Awesome.

***

Continuing the "Gaijinesse is destined for illness" thread, today I met a very sweet girl. The least shy person I've met here, by far. She played with my phone, held her phone up to my ear so I could hear her Just Dance ringtone, messed around with my papers, hung out with me in the cafeteria... and then hours later casually mentioned, "Oh, my throat hurts, So and So thinks I have a cold."

My Life is Less Awesome.

(To be fair to her, I felt like hell all day. If I wasn't sick before, though, I bet I am now. Of course, if she wasn't sick before, she probably is now. Sorry!)

***

I met a guy who seriously was dressed, during a normal day, like he was about to be on the cover of GQ. He wasn't particularly bad looking from the neck up -- but from the neck down, he looked like one of the guys from Inception. Gaijinesse Approved!

***

I keep being told that the transportation here is, like, the most reliable in the world. I was willing to accept that, while my bus is always late, it is so reliably late that I could probably set my watch by its lateness. Until it just didn't show up at all today.

This is the second time in a month that's happened, too. The first time, it was the train back from Yufuin. Oita public transportation, you are letting me down.

***

I saw my vice-principal Moonwalk today.

Really, My Life Is Awesome.